From ABC News:

Police at the Mexico City airport, who detained a man with a suspicious bulge under his T-shirt Monday, found 18 small endangered monkeys concealed under his clothing in a girdle.

Roberto Cabrera, 38, traveled to Mexico City aboard a commercial flight Friday from Lima, Peru, and was searched when he began behaving “nervously,” police said in a statement.

My question is: what was going through this guy’s mind after the fourteenth monkey? “Twelve, thirteen, aaaaaand fourteen. Whew! Done! That should be plenty. Wait a minute. Done? Did I really say “done”? THAT’S PANSY TALK! My dear sweet Papa, God rest his simian-loving soul, didn’t work three jobs to raise a boy who would quit after a mere fourteen primates. Screw that shit! Hand me those other four monkeys, dammit!”